Nothing's Changed

Another day and nothing’s changed. I’m still here without any sense of purpose or of destiny. No school, no job; all day I just live as me, with me. Shadows cloud my consciousness as well as my memories. Past lives and loves linger within my deepest desires. It’s hard to get passed them, even harder to let go; and still they must be faced, the hardest of them all. My mind fails to understand why my heart still cries long after I’ve dried all the tears from my eyes. It’s because my heart still feels what my eyes can’t see. It still longs for what was sown yet not reaped. My dreams open doors I can’t walk through. Like a vampire, I cannot enter unless invited, but no one ever comes home. So, I remain outside in the cold. But unlike the undead, the sun does not affect me. It doesn’t warm me nor comfort me, shun nor reject me. Every night I wait for the sun to rise and allow its light to wash over me, but every morning it appears that it wasn’t worth the wait. Tomorrow’s a new day. So, I hope for the best, but something inside says it’ll be just like the rest.

\/